Feeling like a grape today, or the product of the grape at least? If you were a grape, what kind do you think you’d be, Charmaine Chardonnay, Girty Gewürz, Micky Merlot or a tongue-tied and confused Cserszegi Fuszeres? Every grape has its own distinct identity, and it’s that ‘varietal’ persona that helps us to work out the flavour and style of the wine it’s made from. Like their human counterparts, some grapes are stars, others boring, some have stronger aromas and characters than others and some interact better with the environment in which they’re brought up.

Miles in Sideways is obsessed with pinot noir, whose thin-skinned, temperamental character mirrors his own neurotic obsessions. Fussy but charming when it tries, pinot noiur responds only to the overtures of people who’ll lavish attention on it and will not tolerate being thought of as cheap. It’s doubly infuriating because when it’s good, all that kissing of frogs along the way is just about worth the effort. The gamey strawberryish style of the 2006 Domaine Maillard Chorey-lès Beaune, £14.99, Waitrose, is one expression of pinot, the perfume and vibrant raspberries of the 2007 Saddleback Central Otago Pinot Noir, £14.99, Marks & Spencer, another.

Lower in the burgundian pecking order, gamay when on form is a nubile, unpretentious, light-hearted sort of a grape that just wants to have fun, so if that’s your cuppa, try the summer pudding delights of Sainsbury’s 2006 Taste the Difference Beaujolais-Villages, £5.99. Syrah, aka shiraz, is prolific and ubiquitous. Its it because it’s the only major grape whose French gender is feminine that it adores basking in sunshine? Syrah can be uncomplicated but appealing when young, like Gabriel Meffre’s bright, blackberryish 2007 La Chasse du Pape Syrah, £5.49, Waitrose, or more aromatic, complex and rounded with age like the 2003 Crozes Hermitage L’Esprit du Fief, £12.99, Sainsbury’s.

Cabernet sauvignon is a late developer, but unlike pinot noir and merlot, thick-skinned enough to be accommodating just about wherever it ends up. The classic, oak-veneered, cassis-centred and concentrated 2005 Château Cambon La Pelouse, £17.99, Waitrose, young now, is a case in point. Merlot is a member of the cabernet family, a trickier customer and thinner-skinned than you’d imagine and, xenophobically francophile, it’s best in a fine Pomerol like the stylish, modern, cedary 2005 Château Moulinet, £27.50, Waitrose.

If cabernet is black, chardonnay is a white horse you can take anywhere. As popular as a cheerleader and often as bland, any poor girl named after it has Bridget Jones and Footballers Wives to thank for that indulgence. Lavish a bit of TLC on it though, allow it a jacuzzi in oak barrels and it will adapt its chameleon-like personality to become as amenable as the full-busted and buttery 2006 Bourgogne Chardonnay, £7.99, Marks & Spencer, or in more elegantly stylish Kate Moss form, the classic, minerally 2006 Jean Marc Brocard Chablis 1er cru Quintessence, £15.99, Tesco.

Sauvignon can be restrained or assertive and shrill and loves the cold. In quieter form, it’s stylish and flinty 2007 Sainsbury’s Taste the Difference Pouilly Fumé, £9.99, but its New World counterpart stands out in a crowd, with an odour and body, but not body odour, many find irresistible. Try the aromatic, tropically passion fruity 2007 Jackson Estate Sauvignon Blanc, £9.99, Waitrose, and see what I mean. Gewürztraminer wears a strong scent and its Barbara Windsor bosom can all too easily overwhelm, but feed it Asian food and a wine like the rose-scented, lychee-like 2007 Cono Sur Vision Gewürztraminer ‘Block Las Colmenas’, £7.49, Majestic, will come into its own.

Riesling has a split personality. It can be flabby and sentimentally sugary, but when it’s good, it’s deceptively poised, elegant and can be attractively when it wants to be, or dry. It loves cool weather and dizzy heights and in its myriad personality traits, it can show a steely resolve and even leave a hint of petrol on its clothing. The 2006 O’Leary Walker from Australia’s Clare Valley, £8.99, Waitrose, with its richly fruited lime citrus zip and tang, shows dry riesling’s attributes at its best. And the boring grapes? The air-headed airén, plain pinot grigio and tedious trebbiano will do. There’s always doradillo of course; we all know one of those.

Something for the Weekend 23 August

Under a Fiver

2007 Les Jamelles Viognier, Vin de Pays d’Oc, £3.99, down from £5.49, till tomorrow, Co-op stores

This floral, aromatic southern French viognier shows ripe, fresh pear fruitiness which at this knockdown price makes it the perfect everyday dry white for seafood, parties, drinking on its own, just about anything really.

Under a Tenner

2005 Cordier Bordeaux Grand Vin Prestige Merlot Cabernet Sauvignon, £7.49, down from £9.99, to 11 September, Morrisons.

Although the solemn names Prestige and Grand Vin and the broad-shouldered bottle are normally to be taken with a pinch of sel de mer in affordable claret, this is a surprisingly approachable merlot-based red Bordeaux from a fine vintage in which the mocha oak undertones add balance to the bright cherry and blackcurrant fruit and savoury acidity.

Splash Out

Ayala Brut Champagne, £24.99, buy 6 =£18.74, until tomorrow week, Marks & Spencer

Make a bigger splash this weekend with bubbles of the champagne kind and this stylish, toasty, bruised apple fizz from the excellent Ayala, now that Marks & Spencer is generously lopping 25 per cent off all its wines when you buy 6 until tomorrow week.